funny, quotes, Whatsapp Status

Funny Quotes Online Whatsapp Status


Funny Quotes  Online  Whatsapp Status

Funny Quotes Online Whatsapp StatusHello Friends!!Funny Quotes will always makes you funny but these Funny Quotes are very much essential in our life’s.Even though it’s a funny Quotes but in these Quotes you can  learn about your life , love and friendship.Funny Quotes gives you the better understanding about what is life.Life is funny if you treat it as a funny,life will be serious if you treat as a serious not only that anything the way we treat that way it will be going to be form.I suggestion is to all of you enjoy and each and every moment of your life it’s either good or bad one day you may going to see a good things in your life. Bill Gates said that when you are  born with poor it’s not your mistake but when you die with poor it’s your mistake.

That words are still ringing in my ears  life will be funny if you achieve something wait for wonders to create yourself.Funny Quotes are very simple and easy to understand by anyone and i have mentioned funny Quotes on skydiving, Sleeping,Technology and drama.And these funny Quotes are great to watch and you will never get bored while reading these funny quotes.Keeping in my mind about children,younger and older i have written these funny quotes for the sake of everybody to laugh.These funny Quotes are latest and new and these funny Quotes are so much useful for lover’s and newly married couple because these Quotes gives lot of smiles on their faces when they are in a disturb mood.Every one who is having lot of work for relax purpose read these Quotes definitely you will get refresh with these Quotes.Most of these Quotes are one liners and whatsapp is an instant message app for smartphones and you can download  images or you can share these quotes to your friends to make your friends laugh.  

  

Funny Quotes Online Whatsapp Status

 

Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.

 

Follow your heart but take your brain with you.

 

If life is not smiling at you, give it a good tickling.

 

 

“Did you Just fall?”

“No.I attacked the floor.”

“Backwards?”

“I’m freaking talented!”

 

 

Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years.

 

 

3 a.m. phone call..”hey are you are asleep??”

…”No i’m skydiving”..

 

 

 

“Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.”

 

 

Hey i’ll be back in 5 minutes but if i’m not just read this message again.

 

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back

 

 

After Tuesday,even the calendar goes WT F

 

 

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

 

 

I’m a brilliant brunette with lots of blonde moments!

 

 

Funny Quotes Online Whatsapp Status

 

 

Don’t worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.

 

 

If you fall,i’ll will be there in floor.

 

“I find out a lot about myself by sleeping. Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me.”

 

 

I won’t be impressed with technology until  i can download food.

 

 

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.

 

 

You really funny  doing that with your head.

 

 

Solution to two of the world’s problems: Feed the homeless to the hungry.

 

 

 

D.R.A.M.A.

Dumb

Retards

Asking for

More

Attention

 

Click Here For Wonderful Funny Quotes Online Whatsapp Status

 

Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.

 

 

 

A jealous woman does better research than FBI.

 

 

 

I changed my password everywhere to ‘incorrect.’ That way when I forget it, it always reminds me,

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did–in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like the passengers in his car.

 

 

My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She’s ninety-seven now, and we don’t know where the hell she is.

 

 

Yes officer,I did see the speed limit sign,I just didn’t see you.

 

 

 

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It’s just that yours is stupid.

 

 

 

A man came to my door and asked if i could donate to the local swimming pool and i came back with a glass of water.

 

 

A mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work if it is not open.

 

 

I was born intelligent but education ruined me.

 

 

I would like to die on Mars. Just not on impact.

 

 

The best things in life are free.

The second best are very expensive

Don’t sweat the petty things, and don’t pet the sweaty things.

 

 

People say you can’t live without love…

I think oxygen is more important.

 

 

 

 

 

Coincidence is God’s way of remaining anonymous.

 

 

 

“The mouth is made for communication, and nothing is more articulate than a kiss.”

 

 

Genius begins great works; labor alone finishes them.

 

 

You cry, I cry, …you laugh, I laugh…you jump off a cliff I laugh even harder!!

 

 

We live in the era of smart phones and stupid people.

 

 

Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another drink.

 

 

Don’t be so humble – you are not that great.

 

 

“Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.”

 

 

Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.

 

 

A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald but if he has fire, women will like him.

 

 

Your bank account can be overdrawn, but it can never be overfilled.

 

Silence is golden; duct tape is silver.

 

 

Practice makes perfect but then nobody is perfect so what’s the point of practicing?

 

 

“Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.”

 

Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.

 

 

Biologically speaking, if something bites you, it is more likely to be female.

 

Laughter is like a windshield wiper, it doesn’t stop the rain but allows us to keep going.

 

 

“If I were a bird, I’d fly straight into a ceiling fan.”

 

 

Never argue with an idiot they’ll drag you down to their level and beat you through experience

 

 

This is a quantum car. I don’t know where I am, but I’m going really fast.

 

 

“My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don’t really know me.”

 

 

Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.

 

 

The key is not to think of death as an end. But think of it more as a very effective way of cutting down on your expenses.

 

 

Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.

 

 

If you want your wife to listen to you, then talk to another woman; she will be all ears.

 

 

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.

 

 

“I went to a meeting for premature ejaculatory. I left early.”

 

 

I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.

 

 

I put my phone in airplane mode, but it’s not flying!

 

 

Never judge someone until you walk a mile in their shoes. By that time, they’ll be a mile away and barefoot.

 

 

We’re sorry, the phone number you have reached is imaginary. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try your call again

 

 

Funny Quotes Online Whatsapp Status

 

 

“Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you’re offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone’s feelings.”

 

 

Hell is full of musical amateurs: music is the brandy of the damned.

 

 

I’m sorry that I’m not updating my Facebook status, my cat ate my mouse.

 

 

Don’t think of yourself as an ugly person, think of yourself as a beautiful monkey. It always gets laughs!

 

 

It’s only a game until you lose.

 

 

What great energy, intelligence, and magnificent beautiful eyes… But enough about me, how are you doing?

 

 

Life is Short – Talk Fast!

 

 

Okay, who put a stop payment on my reality check?

 

 

“My wife was afraid of the dark… then she saw me naked and now she’s afraid of the light.”

 

 

Stop the earth from spinning, I want to get off!

 

 

Save paper, don’t do home work.

 

 

Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery.

 

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